How to annoy the Cullens
by Lostlover2012
Summary: Bella one day was online reading some stories.. and she came across a wonderful list about annoying the Cullen's by Skyhawk66. She decided to try a few for herself... Which ends up with some VERY pissed of vampires. Rated T for some swearing. Bella POV.
1. Carlisle

**Hello! This is based on Skyhawk66 lists of how to annoy the Cullen's Enjoy :D! (Ps: In Bella's point of view.) I used the ones I liked the best :P.**

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><p><strong>6 ways to annoy Carlisle Cullen (Ideas by Skyhawk66)<strong>

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><p><strong>1: Burn all his medical books<strong>

I walked out of Edward's room and into Carlisle's office. I grabbed all of his medical books and then took them outside.

"What are you doing?" Edward asked looking shocked.

"Nothing…" I said and took out lighter fluid and a match.

"… I don't want to know…" He said and walked back into the house.

I smiled widely and poured the lighter fluid onto the books and lit a match, throwing it onto the books.

"NOOO!" I heard someone scream from behind.

"BELLA WHAT THE HELL!" Carlisle said, running up to his books and trying to pull some of them out of the fire. He failed miserably.

I smiled evilly and walked calmly back inside.

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><p><strong>2: Tell him Esme left him for Aro<strong>

"Hey Carlisle." I said, walking up to his desk. He still hadn't forgave me for the 'book' incident.

"What do you want, Bella?" He said almost rudely.

"I just wanted to say sorry about what happened." I explained innocently.

"What happened?" He asked, stiffening in his chair a bit.

"You didn't know? Esme left yesterday to go find her true love, Aro."

His face showed utter shock.

"What do you mean?" His voice broke.

Just then my phone began ringing. Just like me and Emmett planned.

"Ah... gotta go... my phone is ringing. Bye Carlisle." I said, walking out of the office.

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><p><strong>3: Trash his office<strong>

I waited until he left for work to go into his office.

It was about noon now and Emmett agreed to help me.

I walked into his office and grabbed my can of spray paint and began painting his desk pink.

*2 hours of trashing LATER*

Carlisle walked into his office and we heard him scream something along the lines of

'EMMETT YOU BETTER GET YOUR ASS IN HERE!'

"Oh shit…" He said before running off.

Well, I had to admit we DID do a pretty good job. After we spray painted his desk we grabbed all his *New* medical books and burned them along with all other ones. Emmett even carved 'Emmett was here' into Carlisle's wooden cross that had hung outside. To say the least, he was pissed.

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><p><strong>4: Get him fired<strong>

Seems easy enough. I walked into the hospital and started to spread rumors about how Carlisle was sleeping around with all his nurses and how he had a warrant for his arrest in California.

That worked all too well.

Carlisle looked like he could rip my head off whenever he got the call about how he was fired.

He he this is fun.

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><p><strong>5: <strong>**Whenever you see him scream "the British are coming" the British are coming and run around like a chicken with its head cut off.**

I sat in my spot on the couch and waiting for Carlisle to come home. After about 20 minutes of waiting, he finally showed up. It's now or never.

I got up from my seat on the couch and started running around the room screaming.

"What's wrong Bella?" He asked me worriedly.

"THE BRITISH ARE COMING THE BRITISH ARE COMING!" I screamed, running even faster than before up the stairs, still screaming.

"What the hell just happened…?" I heard him say downstairs

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><p><strong>6: Tell him his dad was turned into a vampire.<strong>

Wow. These are actually pretty easy. I walked into his office and sat down with a serious look on my face.

"Carlisle. I need to tell you something." I said sincerely.

"What is it now Bella?" He asked, scowling a bit

"Your father.. well he…." I fought the urge to laugh. "Was turned into a vampire." I finished my sentence, still fighting the urge to burst out laughing.

His eyes glared at me. "You're kidding right."

I shook my head. "Oh Carlisle, I wish I was." I got up from my chair and walked out and into Edwards room before I burst out laughing.

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><p><strong>Hoped you liked it :D. I sure did like writing it. :P. Oh. And... I hate to ask this of you viewer but.. Please review? *Puppy dog eyes* Oh you will? Thank you so much! I love reading reviews. They make me feel all warm and happy inside.. Oh and review Skyhawk66's story to for these AWESOME ideas. Thank you viewer :P.<strong>


	2. Edward

**I hope you like it :D. I wrote this one like.. a day ago.. but forgot about it after I went to bed... So... Yeah. Here it is now though.. ENJOY! Also.. Can you do me a favor? After reading this.. Can you check out the awesome Skyhawk66 for giving me these ideas and review on his story for me? He only has one review... and these ideas are awesome! Soo.. Yeah. Pwease?**

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><p><strong>5 ways to annoy Edward Anthony Masen Cullen<strong>

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><p><strong>1: Write I heart Jacob in hot pink on his car<strong>

I picked up my pink spray paint I had used for Carlisle's desk and went over to Edward's Volvo.

This was going to be fun.

I wrote in big letters 'I HEART JACOB' and dotted the I with a heart. Emmett was gonna get a kick outta this.

I finished my work and even got a knife from the kitchen to make sure it cannot be as easily removed. I carved it into the car on all sides as well.

I waited in the kitchen and after about 4-5 minutes I heard a high pitched scream like a girl was being murdered.

"MY BABY!" He screeched and got on his knees.

Okay maybe I went a little too far… Did I just say that? No! Bad Bella. No remorse.

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><p><strong>2: Glue his keys down on his Piano<strong>

I grabbed my glue I had found in a drawer in Emmetts room along with a spoon, lube,a picture of me and a half eaten sandwich. I didn't even want to know why all that stuff was there.

Anyway, I walked over to Edwards room and used the glue to glue down all the keys, and also spray paint it pink just to top it all off.

I sat down in my usual spot on the couch downstairs and waited for him to come home from the car-fixing-place. (From what I had done to his Volvo.)

After 20 minutes of waiting he finally came home.

"Hello, Love." He said, kissing me on my lips.

Instantly I moved to deepen the kiss. He pulled away and I glared at him.

"I have homework…" He said smiling slightly. "No time for distractions." He got up from the couch and began his walk upstairs.

3….2….1… "WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO MY PIANO!" I heard his voice scream quite loudly indeed from upstairs.

_**Crash Crash**_ I heard from upstairs….

I instantly burst out laughing, doubling over unintentionally . I looked up to see Edward giving me a death glare.

"Oh shit…." I said, my eyes widening in fear.

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><p><strong>3: Replace all his classical music with nursery rhymes.<strong>

After I had bagged up all of Edward's music collection, I burned it and replaced all his music. I set a camera up in his room… so here is his reaction.

*You can see Edward's room and after about 5 minutes he walks in and goes to push play on his CD player and the song 'Lttle marry had a lamb' begins playing. Edward looks so confused but looks at all his other music and then screams, noticing that ALL his music is gone. He looks up and notices the camera. He picks up the CD player and chucks it at the camera and everything goes black.*

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><p><strong>4: Dye his hair blue and put glue in his hair gel.<strong> (These were actually two.. but I thought of a way to put them together.)

I sneak steathily into Edwards room and go into his bathroom, careful not to make a sound. I search the room breifly before landing my eyes on EXACTLY what I was looking for. His shampoo bottle. I grab it and unscrew the lid, take out the hair dye and pour it into the bottle and rescrew the lid before shaking it up. I set it back on the shelf and move to his hair gel and take out more of the blue hair dye and gently put it into the hair gel along with glue. This was gonna be fun.

I gently placed it back and walked toward Edwards room to wait. This was gonna be fun.

*Half an hour LATER*

Edward was finally home from the hunt. He had a bit of blood on him so he decided to shower... Hehe.

He walked into the bathroom and I heard the door close before the sound of water began.

*3 minutes of quick showering later*

Edward came outside of the bathroom in a new outfit and his hair was a brillant blue.

"Nice hair." I told him and burst out laughing.

"Thanks. Wait.. What?" He said and turned toward a mirror from the other side of the room.

"WHAT THE HELL!" He screamed and grabbed the mirror and broke it into a million peices.

"MY HAIR!" He screeched and ran from the room.

I was still laughing feeling almost out of breath from his reaction.

I loved screwing with them.

**5: Constantly tell him how much hotter Jacob is**

Now this one was pretty straightforward.. But I decided to have some fun with it.

I laid down in my own bed and waited for Edward to come through my window.

Whenever he did he instantly moved to lay next to me.

I smiled and then I made my face go blank and start to try to act like I'm dreaming.

"Jacob... So hot... Abs..." I said in a hoarse whisper.

"Oh Jacob.. Yeah.. No shirt.. No pants... Yeah Jacob like that.." I tried so hard not to burst out laughing when I felt Edward 'stiffen' next to me.

"Yes Jacob... Faster.. Ohh Yes Harder..." I muttered moaning a bit.

I was 'awoken' by Edward kissing me fircely and moving to get above me.

'This might turn out better then I thought...' I thought while his tounge danced with mine.

*After a night of passion on both sides*

"You know, Jacob would've done that so much better..." I muttered and laid back down in the bed to finally sleep.

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><p><strong>I hoped you liked it :D and thank you *Ahem* <strong>

**MaryAliceBrandonCullenForever,**

**Team Edward Rules All, (Can't agree more.)**

**Blonde,**

**anon, (Twice... So.. Pretty sure that was a glitch.. but.. Thanks!)**

**Alexx141,**

**Mrs . EmilySalvatore, (Wouldn't let me do your name right. Sorry.)**

**Jessica01,**

**And last but certainly not least... *Drum roll***

**Roxie I do byte.**

**Thank you all for reviewing. ;D. So until next time... Review.. Andd Bye :P.**


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